When I was a teenager there were a couple of men in our church who were gay--secretly. I remember some of my friends being invited to a campout. There was a "hunting" trailer somewhere in the country for deer season. I didn't go and thought nothing of it. I wasn't invited again. Some of my friends went and I remember they had other gatherings with basically the same group.
I ended up going to college in my hometown. These men continued their secret lives while my friends and I attended college while attending our childhood church.
These gay men were generally nice to be around. One worked with the youth and the other taught a male Sunday School class. These men were considerate, funny, and caring. I liked them.
They were "in the closet" so I didn't know anything about that part of their lives. And they certainly weren't open about it. One was married with children. The church would not have appreciated their activities.
I remember hearing about these men being discovered shortly after I graduated from college. I was surprised and thought it was sad for everyone concerned. I later heard there were other gay men in our small church and small town.
I'll have to admit I was completely surprised by this revelation. I had no idea. I was so taken with the opposite sex I couldn't fit the concept of homosexuality into my mind. I was sheltered and naive. At first it was purely a scientific consideration. From a hardware perspective nuts and bolts are useless alone but mutually unite to fulfill their individual purposes. I had no framework for two nuts or two bolts messing around. I learned there's more to human sexuality than I suspected.
I also learned two of my high school peers from church and college came out of the closet soon after graduation. They aren't and weren't a couple when they came out. I remember a time when they dated girls, but I guess something turned them in a different direction. They evidently understood the finer points of homosexuality some time before I even knew it existed. I can't help but wonder.
These two were good friends to me when we were young and involved in church stuff. I assume they haven't disowned me. Even though we took separate paths after college, I haven't disowned them. They were talented, considerate, and funny when we were young and I'm guessing they still are. I have good memories of our growing up together. I'd do for them what I'd do for anyone who needed me.
I guess the elephant in the room is did the secret gay men in my church influence two of my friends into opting for a gay lifestyle? I wouldn't know what to do with the answer if I had it. It wouldn't change anything and they wouldn't agree with my thinking about alternatives. I'm guessing they aren't crazy about the Bible's teaching about homosexuality. It's sadly exclusive. They might say Jesus didn't speak against homosexuality, but I'd counter he didn't say anything about incest either. Knowing the answer to what may have happened 40 years ago wouldn't change anything now. That's how durable these changes appear to be.
But back then, if those men did influence young men, it's a crying shame.
I guess my concern is about the role of gays in the church. I'm confident gays and straights need equal access to God's grace and mercy in the sanctuary. However, the Bible speaks clearly about those who would subvert young people into any lifestyle contrary to what is written. Teaching youngsters to become insensitive to immorality, poverty, hatred, pride, or promiscuity, etc. is dangerous business.
This may be one of the biggest issues facing the modern church. I vote for grace and mercy in the context of carefulness.
I ended up going to college in my hometown. These men continued their secret lives while my friends and I attended college while attending our childhood church.
These gay men were generally nice to be around. One worked with the youth and the other taught a male Sunday School class. These men were considerate, funny, and caring. I liked them.
They were "in the closet" so I didn't know anything about that part of their lives. And they certainly weren't open about it. One was married with children. The church would not have appreciated their activities.
I remember hearing about these men being discovered shortly after I graduated from college. I was surprised and thought it was sad for everyone concerned. I later heard there were other gay men in our small church and small town.
I'll have to admit I was completely surprised by this revelation. I had no idea. I was so taken with the opposite sex I couldn't fit the concept of homosexuality into my mind. I was sheltered and naive. At first it was purely a scientific consideration. From a hardware perspective nuts and bolts are useless alone but mutually unite to fulfill their individual purposes. I had no framework for two nuts or two bolts messing around. I learned there's more to human sexuality than I suspected.
I also learned two of my high school peers from church and college came out of the closet soon after graduation. They aren't and weren't a couple when they came out. I remember a time when they dated girls, but I guess something turned them in a different direction. They evidently understood the finer points of homosexuality some time before I even knew it existed. I can't help but wonder.
These two were good friends to me when we were young and involved in church stuff. I assume they haven't disowned me. Even though we took separate paths after college, I haven't disowned them. They were talented, considerate, and funny when we were young and I'm guessing they still are. I have good memories of our growing up together. I'd do for them what I'd do for anyone who needed me.
I guess the elephant in the room is did the secret gay men in my church influence two of my friends into opting for a gay lifestyle? I wouldn't know what to do with the answer if I had it. It wouldn't change anything and they wouldn't agree with my thinking about alternatives. I'm guessing they aren't crazy about the Bible's teaching about homosexuality. It's sadly exclusive. They might say Jesus didn't speak against homosexuality, but I'd counter he didn't say anything about incest either. Knowing the answer to what may have happened 40 years ago wouldn't change anything now. That's how durable these changes appear to be.
But back then, if those men did influence young men, it's a crying shame.
I guess my concern is about the role of gays in the church. I'm confident gays and straights need equal access to God's grace and mercy in the sanctuary. However, the Bible speaks clearly about those who would subvert young people into any lifestyle contrary to what is written. Teaching youngsters to become insensitive to immorality, poverty, hatred, pride, or promiscuity, etc. is dangerous business.
This may be one of the biggest issues facing the modern church. I vote for grace and mercy in the context of carefulness.
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